what is the role of parents Raising Smart, Confident and Successful Children? What matters? what not? Although I am the mother of two happy and inspired entrepreneurial sons, these are questions I never thought to ask.
Looking back, I’d love to read stories about how entrepreneurs grew up—not just Bill Gates And Steve JobsBut the people we could really identify with.
In my view, entrepreneurs are not the only founders of for-profit businesses. They are resilient, hardworking people who start something, who come up with ideas and bring them to life, who turn passions into projects.
As I researched and wrote my book, “Raising an Entrepreneur” I interviewed 70 parents who raised highly successful adults. Here are his four tough parenting rules that set him apart from other people:
1. Give Children Too Much Freedom
Susan and Anne Wojcicki There are two incredibly accomplished sisters. Susan, Google’s first marketing manager, became its CEO in 2014. Anne co-founded 23andMeA genomics and biotech company.
when i talked to his mom EstherIt was clear that her girls had grown up knowing that she trusted them to behave responsibly.
Girls were given the freedom that few parents, especially today, would bow to. “I gave my kids a chance to be independent very quickly,” Esther told me. “I had three kids in four years, and there was no help, so I put them to work out of necessity.”
Her children loved that feeling of freedom. “I think it gave him a lot of confidence,” she said. “My mom lived in L.A., and I’d put my five-year-old daughter on a plane [alone] – with a name tag around her neck – to visit her grandma in LA”
Even if you’re afraid to give your kids the kind of freedom Esther gave her daughters, she said, “You can still give them chores around the house to contribute to the family.” such as working to make them responsible and develop their self-confidence.”
2. Actively Nurture Compassion
Children whose parents show them what it’s like to help others who are struggling around the world or at the kitchen table get a head start in developing compassionate attitudes.
Scott Harrison is the founder Charity Water, a non-profit organization that repairs and maintains wells to provide people with sustainable access to clean water. In just 15 years, Charity:Water has funded 60,000 projects in 29 developing countries, brought clean water to 12 million people, and raised nearly half a billion dollars for the cause.
Before Scott’s mom Joan passed away, she told me she attributes her success to the parenting foundation they built on spiritual community, disciplined, and hard work.
When he was in elementary and middle school, she would help him sort his clothes, books, and toys, and they would give some to the kids who could use them.
Early awareness of the problems of others can also encourage children to ask entrepreneurial questions: “Should things really be that way?” “How can I make them better?”
3. Welcome Failure Early and Often
Nia Batts co-founded Detroit WarAn inclusive, non-toxic hair and beauty service. I met Nia about 10 years ago when she worked at Viacom.
When I asked her how she mustered up the courage to quit her secure job and start something anew, she said it was because she learned the virtues of failing early and often when she was younger.
Nia said, “My mother was a trial attorney. Most of the times she won, sometimes she lost.” “I remember my dad often asking me, ‘What failed you today?’ He asked me when I was young and was taking me to or from school; he asked me when I was in college; and he asked me more often than not when I started working.
I have seen many parents try to protect their children from failure. But Nia’s parents wanted to make sure she created an environment where it was okay to fail. “I think they were excited to see the process go through as I grew up and learn that lesson. My father taught me that in your wounds are your gifts, and in your failures are your opportunities,” she said.
4. Give up control and lead by following
Children need time to find their way. Many experience times when it is not clear where they are going. In this situation, some parents may see their children as lost. But parents of children who grow up to be entrepreneurs are more likely to view their children as explorers.
Here’s the hard part for a lot of parents: If you want to raise an entrepreneur, you need to lead by following, regardless of where your child wants to go.
Kenneth Ginsbergauthor of “Building Resilience in Children and Adolescents,” It advises: “Getting out of the way is a challenge. We want to help, heal, and guide kids. But we need to remind ourselves that when we let them figure things out for themselves, So we communicate this: ‘I think you are capable and intelligent.'”
In other words, see what your kids want, what their passion is, what they’re good at, and what makes them happy. Let his gift manifest itself. Then support it. Tell them how proud you are of them for being successful in their chosen path. And then tell them over and over again, until you’re sure they believe it.
They may not end up with the career you have in mind, but if they are able to pursue their passion, they will be happy and fulfilled. And isn’t that what all parents want for their children?
Margot Machol Bisno She is an author, mom and parenting expert. He spent 20 years in government, including as an FTC commissioner and chief of staff on the President’s Economic Advisory Council, and is the author of “Raising an Entrepreneur: How to Help Your Kids Fulfill Their Dreams.” follow him on instagram @margotbisnow,
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